Wednesday, May 28, 2014

Life is a rare, beautiful thing

The first part of this blog was written on Saturday, April 19th.

The kids came racing into my bedroom, jumping on my bed, yelling "Mommy, get up! It's NOON!"
Was it really noon?? The alarm clock beside my bed is an hour behind. I have yet to figure out how to change it. Electronics and I don't get along and I have other things to expend my energy on. Sure enough, the blue lights blared 11:03am.
 
I thought I'd feel refreshed after sleeping like a sloth for almost half a day! But instead, I didn't move. I was soaking up the thought of a new day, the sunshine peeking in my window and smiling at the three adorable blondies anxious for their Mama to arise from the bed. Eventually they gave up on me, as I tried to snuggle with them instead. And then there was peace and quiet again.
 
I had set a goal to try and make a group run at 8am but I failed. The snooze button won. My no show record for early morning runs is embarrassing. I really wish there were late morning or early afternoon group runs. I would So be there!
 
I've been sick everyday this week since running the Cherry Blossom Ten Miler last Sunday. Even though I'd felt like a RockStar Runner at the finish line.
 
                Cherry Blossom Ten Miler 2014 Finisher!
 
(Finished writing this blog last night, May 27th)

I blame my fierce fatigue, during Spring Break week, on a Lyme flare up that I was first unaware of. It was my fellow Lyme disease warriors who pieced the puzzle together and then the picture was complete. There was no denying it. My body was being attacked and the Lyme disease toxin war waged all week long.
 
Fast forward and a couple of weeks later I'm running a relay race...a race that was more mentally, than physically exhausting...but more on that later. It was a speed bump moment in life, carefully crafted to make me stronger.
 
But it was when I was having the Lyme flare up, that one of my friend's husband suddenly passed away without warning. This significant event prompted me to start writing this blog post in April. He had been sick for a number of years but he was a warrior too and always pulled through. I knew he had been hospitalized in the beginning of the week. Sadly, this time, he didn't come home. And six weeks later, I am still processing what happened to this family, shattered without warning.
 
Today I had lunch with her and another mutual friend, who suggested we all get together. The three of us became friends through a local Moms of Multiples group and met when our twins were young. I think some of my best warrior friends are Mom's of Multiple's because we supported each other in times we were clueless on how to care for more than one baby, and we were often dealing with extreme medical issues because most multiples are preemies. We would help each other at play dates if one kid ran off or was fussy so that we could stay and have (much needed) adult socialization instead of having to leave. The support from this group of friends was incredible and the friendship between us was unconditional.
 
However, today, we were there helping our friend through a different kind of struggle, one that most of us cannot even comprehend. We listened and gave her a comfortable space to allow her emotions to be expressed freely. I tried to not offer advice but more, to hold my friend, in that exact moment in time. I felt tears forming as she spoke about the difficulties and roller coaster emotions her and her twin girls are experiencing. It was hard to hear everything her family is going through but there was no where else I was supposed to be at that moment but with my friend, absorbing her pain and offering her my unconditional friendship.
 
More often than not, I think about "what if?" What if my health was in such crisis that I couldn't do the things I love to do, with the people I care about it? What if I suddenly passed away or was seriously injured in a car accident? What if it was someone I loved, that I would never say "hello" to again, without given a chance to ever say "goodbye?"
 
It may seem childish and naïve, and sometimes selfish, but this is why I chose to wake up everyday and grab on to the life that is given to me at that very moment, standing still in time. Yesterday is gone, tomorrow is not promised to us, so all we have is today. "Seize the day" is so cliché but it is a motto I live by!
 
Be thankful. Express gratitude. Say "I love you." Give hugs generously. Donate to charity. Help a neighbor. Volunteer. Call your long lost best friend or family member to reconnect again. Travel. Run in the rain. Do something that scares you. Write a letter. Visit your grandparents. Invite your parents over for dinner. Make time for celebrations. Discover something new everyday.

Life is a rare, beautiful thing! How are you going to capture the beauty of it today?
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